Can an Abuser Change for Good?

Purposefully Scarred

Link to "Can Abusers Change?" Link to “Can Abusers Change?”

Women and men remain in – and return to – abusive relationships for many reasons. For example, it is not uncommon for victims of abuse to remain in the abusive situation because they believe that the abuser will change. This is most common in situations where the abused individual has a great emotional investment in their abuser (i.e. dating or marriage relationships). They love their abuser, despite the violence, and so they hope that some day the abuse will stop.

Is that false hope? Do abusive people ever stop? Violence is a learned behavior and, thus, it must be unlearned.

Before answering the question, “Can an abuser change for good?” we should consider two illustrations of abusive behavior*:

1) The Cycle of Violence represents the three most common stages of the abuser-abused relationship. These stages repeat over and over until either the abuser chooses to…

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